Knickers.

Fans, friends, bass of all ages. I am saying goodbye to Kansas City for a while and moving across the pond. I know that as much fun as I can be at social events, there comes a time in every man's life, when he has to pack his stuff into bags and boxes and ship it halfway across the world and have a whole new work experience.

Thank you Kansas City.

4 finga ring.

Postville, IA

2 things came to mind today:

1) Car flags. What happened to them? They used to be everywhere. Come on America, have you lost your spirit? Bring the troops home-9/11-Freedom. Shit.

2)The Flu. 9 out of 10 people I know are on the verge of death from this flu. Flu shot=flu. Bird flu=bad.

6 precious days remain until I leave my beloved homeland behind.

Rumble in the Jungle.

Last night marked another landmark in my life. My First Professional Boxing Match. Having said that, it was the IBA World Championship Womens Minimumweight Title fight. There were 4 other bouts, so much boxing it made my head hurt. The announcer, who I eventually met at Waffle house at *undisclosed hour*, was the voice of the Cleveland Cavaliers. So I made him say, "Lebroooooooooooooooooooooon Jaaaaaaaaaaaaaaames"

It made me laugh and cry and have a moment.

This is a picture of the ring and me in my boxing apparel. Visor: 4 frosties, shirt 28 chicken nuggets, blazer: 3 junior bacon cheeseburgers.

The lady on the left won. And i won a free lunch. Thanks Svetlana. So here is a note to you:

If we ever run into each other again, I probably won't shake your hand. I probably won't even say anything or tell you that I bet a BBQ lunch on your fight. But thanks. Thanks for kicking the crap out of that other skinny bitch. I mean you really dominated her. And she just smiled. No really, it pissed me off to. That's why I was yelling all those curse words. So, Svetlana, you are the bomb.

Thanks, Luke

http://www.thephatphree.com/features.asp?SectionID=1

Official countdown until Luke moves to London: 14 days.

Grandmama and I as Gus'. Ernie Peniston was the performance for the evening. Blessed with a great last name.

This is me at our work 80's bowling night. I bowled a 114 left handed and a 94 right handed, no big deal.

Gas to top of Applachian mountains: $3.50

Breakfast for dinner at restaurant: $7.00

Eating my first piece of Livermush: I am still trying to digest it.

This is me standing in the Appalachian mountains. Two beautiful feats of nature.

This is a photo of a dump truck that dumped over out in front of my hotel in Baltimore. It was the most literal thing I have seen in a while.

On the blog again, I can't wait to get on the blog again.

If you want a good band to see live and have the lead singer play a flute/piano thing, then see Hard-Fi live. They have a radio hit, "Cash Machine." And many of their songs are quite good. They are based in the UK, soon to be my home(leave March 2nd), so you should try and catch them on their US tour.

When it comes to marketing what company does it beter than McDonald's. I mean come on they have served "billions and billions"(by the way, counting to billions and billions seems impossible considering the fact that the contigency of Mickey D's employees during my lifetime has hardly been able to count back my 41 cents change) Back to my point, we go to Salt Lake City, Utah. Below is a picture of the signage below the double arches. I thought to myself, "What better way to ring in the Holidays with a damn fruit salad." Mmmmmm. It's like a taco salad without the good bowl and has those yellowish green grapes always at the bottom.

Photo taken by Schnoebelen during Sundance/Ski trip.

Today: North Carolina, home of people who are always eating.
So as I sit 10,000 feet high on a mountain in North Carolina near the foothills of the Applachian mountains (deep breath followed by subtle gas) I think to myself. North Carolina is really boring. All this state does is eat, make furniture, and sell use cars. With an exception of the people that work at the Hospital I am working at, no one does a damn thing. There are more used cars per capita than people. Every piece of land is suitable for a used car dealership, if you own a business, own a gravel lot, or just have a damn yard you can sell cars.

All people do in NC is eat. Tonight Huber and I ate livermush, it tasted as it sounds. Thank you to Key Lime Pie for removing the livermush thoughts from my head. God bless you Key Lime Pie. Back in KC for a day then to IC to have fun with fam, then packing.

Sundance Kid (Part Deux)

This is the only proof that Matt has that he was at Sundance. O.J. is driving by in the background. (Side note: If you ever want to ski in PC, go during Sundance. The slopes are empty, but be careful for those double blues, because you might hurt your "ankle".)

This is me on a huge cow. I wanted to express my independence by hurdling my 170 lb. body on to a 5 foot tall cow. The cow survived, my groin is still in recovery. 8 seconds bitches.
This store is also home to the world's best hot chocolate.

Here is a picture of the moose at the No Name Saloon, where every single 30+ 4'6" and under woman hugged me. Home of some good Heffeveisen, the world's hottest shittin' beef jerky(made me cry), and the ghettoest jukebox this side of the Mississippi(Matt, Derek, and I got to pick 20 songs. I overheard a lady say, "Did they just go from David Bowie to Chuck Berry?"

Matt Hicks left his mark on The Canyons. They will tell his story for years to come. That story will include butt and fart jokes, stories of his sweet L.L. Bean fleece, stories of his spills at the flat bottom part of the hills and how he made out with Jennifer Aniston.



He will live in infamy.